Randy+Brooklyn: 2018

Jef and Robyn's Family Visit

We went swimming multiple times and SUP'ing at Waimea. They invited us to their pool at the Waikiki Hilton and Ezra had a blast. Even though they had slides his favorite part seemed to be eyeing women in the jacuzzi! All the cousins had a sleepover at our house complete with pizza and watching cooking shows. One of my favorite parts was catching up with Robyn. We walked to the Poke Bar and it was so tasty! I have had poke from Foodland, Tamura's and the Kahuku Superette but I loved all the choices they had for toppings. To top it off we had macaroon ice cream sandwiches (the mango was heavenly). I'm pretty sure we talked for over 2 hours before we ran into the rest of the family and realized how long we had been out. I loved catching up and talking about the gospel, family, etc.

Momma Surf Sesh

So normally I am not the best at putting social activities together. I am trying to break past my overly passive habits of just waiting to be invited to do things. So this month I organized a momma surf sesh and it was so fun! It was Raye, Rachael, Victoria, and me. With all of us having kids it can be tricky to find time to surf so we took turns surfing while some of the moms watched the kids at Turtle Bay. It worked! I'll be honest I hated figuring out the basic logistics but once I got past that it was cake! It's a win-win situation because all of the momma's get to surf and the kids get to play together at the beach so everyone is happy!

Primary Program

We had our primary program on the 23rd of this month. The theme was I am a Child of God. These programs can always be a nerve-wracking but to be honest it wasn't too stressful! I decided to just let go of hovering over everyone's jobs. I delegated and let the chips fall where they may and the primary program was incredible! The older kids wrote their own talks and the younger once filled in sentences we gave them to say. It was one of the more personalized and heart-felt programs I've seen and it's all thanks to my counselor Wendy, who was over the program and Terra who did the music. One of the girls talked about her grandmother who has cancer. Towards the end I felt the spirit so strong. I couldn't stop the tears welling up in my eyes as the children sang and when I looked at the other leaders I noticed they were feeling it too. There is something incredibly powerful about children singing and speaking truths and recognizing their worth. I am so grateful for the gospel and for all the direction it provides. We all our truly children of a loving God and when you really know that deep in your soul...what can really stop you?

Movies and Books (warning it is LONG)

This month I experienced a couple new things. One of those was watching Fiddler on the Roof. I had seen bits and pieces before but not the whole thing. We rented it from the library and I absolutely LOVED it! I now see where Gwen Stefani gets her inspiration! As someone who doesn't even really like musicals I was blown away with the songs and storyline. Events about families, especially when they have numerous sisters like Pride and Prejudice, Little Women and oddly enough Dan in Real Life are some of my absolute favorites. This leads me to the books I read. I talked about reading Boys Adrift last month and decided to read about the problems girls face in Dr. Sax's book Girls on the Edge.

As a woman now thinking back on some of my own experiences as a girl I really resonated with so many points Dr. Sax makes. One issue he mentions is how many girls are starting puberty MUCH earlier than before. He explains the price of puberty. "During sexual maturation, the brain loses plasticity and cognitive flexibility." He also writes about how our ability to assimilate complex new skills--such as playing a musical instrument, riding a bicycle, or achieving athletic prowess declines dramatically after puberty. It isn't that adolescence is bad but with girls starting their period around age 7 it can be problematic. Some things that could help delay this are breastfeeding, avoiding environmental toxins (plastics, toxic products), eating a high fiber diet, and girls having a close relationship with their biological fathers.

I was blown away when he mentioned this weird phenomenon where girls' puberty is delayed when they are around their biological fathers (something they think is tied to pheromones). And when they are raised with men other than their biological dads this tends to speed up the onset of puberty for girls. I'm not saying stepfathers are bad but this was all news to me and thought it was incredibly interesting!

Other interesting tidbits include:

. Steering our daughters away from playing sports that focus too much on how you look (cheerleading, figure skating, etc.). Also cheerleading is one of most dangerous sports--more than football?!
. Starting early is not always better (he talks about this in regards to sports and even reading--once again my mind was blown).
. The U.S. has the lowest rate of breastfeeding in the developed world.
. There are sex differences in the visual system (boys and girls literally see the world differently).
. Girls tend to perform better in all-girls schools (this surprised me).
. Group contrast effects (I can totally remember doing this in PE).
. Coed formats have the effect of homogenizing girls: variations among the girls fade away, and the differences between the sexes are exaggerated.
. If we don't teach our kids about becoming women and men and what that can look like then the marketplace will provide "ready-to-wear images" of the ready-made feminine and masculine that are unrealistic and inauthentic. Young people don't know this because they have received no parental guidance.
. "The spirit cannot grow and be healthy if there is not enough silence." -TS Eliot
. Alcohol is involved in the majority of rapes--including date rape.
. If you don't know who you are then you become vulnerable to obsessions (eating disorders, grades, sports).
I would highly encourage anyone raising or teaching girls to read this book. I could go on and on but since I want this blog to about my family I'll stop here ;)

Randomly the other new thing I did this month was get my hair colored with henna and chopped a bunch off--last time I cut my hair was before I had Ezra! I had to keep the henna on my hair for about 8 hours but I really liked the warm brown color it turned out to be.

Gearing Up

Since we are visiting family next month in cold places we have made a few trips to Savers for jackets and pants. Ezra looks incredibly adorable in winter clothes! I am excited for him to wear his jacket just because he looks so stinkin' cute! We decided to plan this trip so he could see his cousins and grandparents. We also wanted to go before he was 2 and will have to buy another plane ticket!

Learning how to pour water on his head

"Are you ready to get out of the bath Ezra?"

Ezra is VERY into bikes right now

Chilling with my homie at Stables

Figuring out the drinking fountain

Nursery

The sweetest car singing

Shark's Cove (our new favorite spot for Ezra)

Rest in peace swing...you were good to us!

Playing in the rain

Spinning

I spy a fish!

My whole world

Perfect baby pool

Yes this is what it looks like! Apparently Spam in the hot ticket item to smuggle out of Walmart.

Ezra getting creative so he doesn't have to eat on the kitchen floor.

Someone doesn't want to go to bed

Haircut

Partying with Jef and Robyn's family!

Playing with cousins at Waimea

Blue Steel

We found Ezra's new favorite playground

Trying on Daddy's boots

Getting a haircut from Dad

Papaya lover

It has been a time of celebration as our good friends, Zach and Jenny, got sealed in the Laie temple! It was also a time for celebration because Ezra got a new carseat (forward facing). He LOVES being able to see us and out the windows. And while the novelty of this new item lasts Ezra has been more compliant about getting in (this only lasted a week or so) when we hit the road.

We also "celebrated" hand, foot, and mouth disease this month with are very own party at a remote beach with all of our diseased friends and their kids. I don't wish for anyone to get this ailment but it sure was nice having company through the course of it! Ezra only had to be mildly quarantined (nursery, church, parks,etc.) since half his buddies had HFMD too. He had such a mild case--it started with a moderate fever for a day (puked a couple times) and then moved into a red-dotted rash mainly on his arms and bum for a week.

Tis also the season for hurricanes! What an exciting month. Don't be fooled when people tell you Hawaii is an endless paradise. I jest--Oahu comes pretty dang close! But yes--hurricanes--or more like tropical storms for us. It seemed like the media was really hyping up hurricane Lane more than others in the past. My cynical side says they are trying to freak people out more than they actually should so we'll watch the news more but who knows! We did get some rain but it was funny to see that most people in our neighborhood were underwhelmed with the storm's delivery. I am not saying we are begging for a hurricane but when you get all hunkered down and ready you kind of expect to see some action. In the end, we are very grateful the storms were mild this year.

I've been taking bromocriptine (it drops my prolactin levels) to help me get pregnant again but didn't have as much luck with it as I did with Ezra (it only took me a month or two of being on the medicine to get pregnant). I'm not too worried--I have this feeling that the timing of our next sweet baby will be just right. I've decided to go off of the bromo for a while and see how my body responds (my prolactin levels are much lower/healthier than they were before). I can have periods on my own and even ovulate without the medicine so maybe my body doesn't need it? I am also breastfeeding still--I've wondered if that could be affecting hormones in a critical way.

Ezra truly is such a sweet kid though! I count my blessings I get to be his mother. He turns 2 soon and it's blowing my mind he is 20 months! He's got a nice routine going with walks/park in the mornings and going to the beach usually in the later afternoons after his nap. We have essentially been living at Stables (beach spot by Turtle Bay). You can drive right up to the beach (appeals to my lazy side) and it's right next to a barn and horses! And tons of shade (very important for such a fair-skinned baby.

A few other random tidbits: I just read a book called Boys Adrift and it kind of blew my mind (in a good way). If you have boys I would HIGHLY recommend it! The author also has a book titled Girls on the Edge which I plan to read next. The author is Leonard Sax and the other book of his I have on my list is The Collapse of Parenting. After reading Boys Adrift I couldn't stop talking to almost every mother I came into contact with at the park about the challenges boys face in American society--girls definitely have challenges too but they are different from boys--hence the book Girls on the Edge. One of the biggest takeaways I had was the need for us to approach their educational needs in different ways (e.g., possibly holding them back a year to start school or looking into boy-friendly schools). Sax clearly explains the differences in brain development by gender and how that affects their behavior in varying ways. In essence, your sex matters and our kids benefit when we pay attention to those differences. There is a part of me that would love to write a book report on this subject but today is not that day!